'Making Money' by Terry Pratchett

ISBN: 0061161640
Format: Hardcover, 384pp
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Price: $25.95

Moist Von Lipwig is the original con man. He’s so good at it that he’s conned the entire city of Ank-Morpork into believing he’s honest and trustworthy. The thing is that they believe in him even though he keeps telling them they shouldn’t! After all, Ank-Morpork loves a good show. In Going Postal Moist took over the dying Ank-Morpork postal service and turned into a jewel of the city. So when the Royal Bank of Ank-Morpork falls on some hard times the obvious choice is the man in the Golden Suit.

Lord Vetinari, in a very Vetinari move, lets Moist maneuver himself into the job; a job that Moist is convinced he doesn’t necessarily want. But lately the Post Office just hasn’t felt the same and Moist is missing that zing from life that lets him know he’s alive. It doesn’t help that his fiancé, Adore Belle Dearheart or Spike for short, is away hunting Golems. With her gone Moist has resorted to Extreme Sneezing and picking all the locks in the Post Office building in the dark to get that zing.

But once Moist takes over the Royal Bank life is crackling again. He’s got a lot of work ahead of him if he’s going to convince the city that paper money is just as good as gold. Especially when the bank vaults turn out to be empty and oh-so-serious Mr. Bent, manger of the bank, decides that Moist isn’t the right kind of man for the job. With Cosmo Lavish, part owner of the bank, dreaming of being Vetinari and a man from Moist’s dark past creeping up from behind, Moist has a lot on his plate.

There are always a few supporting characters that steal the show. I’ve always been partial to the Igors when they show up, in whatever incarnation, and of course the Golems. In Making Money my hands down favorite was Mrs. Lavish. How fantastic is a gin-swilling, silver-cross-bow-toting old woman? Fantastic I tell you! Of course the Chairman was good too. How can you not love a dog that is partial to the kind of goodies kept in a bedside drawer? My one complaint with this whole wonderful book is that I felt Pratchett could have gone into more detail with the Royal Mint and the men who actually make the money, The Men of the Sheds. Instead these aspects were glossed over, mystery hinted at but never uncovered. I hate to complain (says the complainer) but I wanted more damnit! More!

However when I’m feeling a bit down and need a laugh I pick up my well loved paperback copy of (insert title here). You can’t go wrong with any of the Discworld novels. But, like his characters, Prachett is well rounded. He’ll make you laugh and think, possibly even tear up before a book ends. (Usually with laughter) Pratchett uses his humor to comment on the world today and the relevant issues we face. But he’s never preachy about it and he doesn’t let it get in the way of a good story.

If you are going to read Terry Pratchett for the first time I wouldn’t start with Making Money. You’ll get more out of this title if you’ve read Going Postal (especially since both books contain the same set of characters) and you’d get even more out of it if you’ve read the rest of the Discworld series.

'Lean Mean Thirteen' by Janet Evanovich

ISBN: 0312349491
Format: Hardcover, 320pp
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
Price: $27.95


There was a time when I would rush to my local bookseller and pick up the latest in the Stephanie Plum series the day it came out. I would not get anything done until I had read it cover to cover . I haven’t rushed out the same day since Hard Eight. I hate to admit but I don’t even go out the next day. I’ve gotten to the point with this series that I don’t wait for the paperback but it is not the priority it once was.

There are a lot of reasons to love Stephanie Plum. Unfortunately it seems that lately there are some reasons to not like her as much. When this series first started it was gritty, funny too, but it had an edge that for me has dulled over time. I guess this should be expected or maybe, and I can admit this, it might just be me.

The books have gotten shorter, more choppy, as the series has progressed. If you have read any of Ms. Evanovich’s earlier work, titles that are being re-released such as Back to the Bedroom, you can see some similarities. It feels as if less time is going into a Plum book. The writing is not as tight, nor does it flow quite as well. I still enjoy it, don’t get me wrong, but Stephanie isn’t who she used to be and no amount of car explosions, dead bodies, and big sloppy dogs can change that.

The love triangle is another story. There are plenty for and against the continuation of the back and forth between Ranger and Morelli. But I’m tired of the limbo. There is no definition and it has lost it’s appeal for me. She has slept with both men, the sexual tension that was once white hot is a dull red no matter what is done to try to pump up the action.

Lean Mean Thirteen is mediocre. Stephanie is still doing her bond enforcement thing, Morelli is doing his cop thing, Lula is Lula , and Ranger is… well just Ranger. The characters feel as if they are in a holding pattern. Scenes that should have been funny fell flat and the mystery with Stephanie’s ex-husband Dickie, while good, just seemed to be missing something.

When Dickie goes missing Stephanie falls under suspicion for his possible murder. Wanting to clear her name, she starts to look into what her ex had been up to and uncovers a money-laundering scheme. Unfortunately for her she gets caught sticking her nose in where it doesn’t belong, and becomes a target for a crazy flamethrower wielding psycho.

There were hints that possible change is around the corner but I have to wonder why we didn’t see more change here? Stephanie is keeping Ranger at arms' length but there is no action with Morelli. She is also thinking about the fact that maybe a home like her mothers wouldn’t be too bad but admits to herself that she thinks it’s a dream she could never realize.

There were some good things about this book. Exploding road-kill, Dickie Orr gets his nose broken, and Stephanie staples a man's private parts. I didn’t laugh out loud, but it was pretty funny. I enjoyed Lean Mean Thirteen while I read it. But once I was done I was not satisfied with the ending. Not as funny as previous books have been but with a decent mystery; I would just recommend to wait for the paperback to come out.

'Diary of Indignities' by Patrick Hughes

ISBN: 1595821031
Format: Paperback, 256pp
Publisher: Dark Horse Comics
Price:$14.95

While I read Diary of Indignities I marked passages I thought were funny and wanted to share. When I finished reading I realized that I couldn’t share it all because I would have to copy more than half the book down. Okay, the whole book. I laughed, I was shocked and often disgusted, but overall highly entertained.

Diary of Indignities started out as a blog by the name of Bad News Hughes written with brutal honesty by none other than Patrick Hughes. He used the blog to chronicle the daily indignities of his life and now he sits “naked on a throne of human skulls, drinking warm blood while surveying my blog empire of pain” with a book to show for all his trouble. I think he puts it rather well.

So what kind of indignities will you come across? Every single horrible, unimaginable thing your brain could dream up to torment you at three in the morning; those things you do while drunk and claim to not remember or are lucky enough not to. There are a lot of those stories in here. The crazy relatives, and trust me he has yours beat, stories that we all share with friends… and yes, with the stranger sitting next to you on the bus. Patrick Hughes bares his dirty soul to the world and I for one am glad to know I’m not alone in some of the stupid things I’ve done.

I am a huge fan of my local Friends of the Library book sale so I was thrilled to learn that Mr. Hughes was as well. In "Francis Ford Coppola is a Dick," a chapter that has very little to do with Francis Ford Coppola, he touches on the madness that is one of these book sales. The pushing, shoving, and being caught by your mom and her elderly friends with a copy of Penthouse Forum in the adult section of the sale. Good times.

There are also several chapters in which Mr. Hughes doles out advice for the kids. In many cases the advice is something you are sure the author learned the hard way. There are such classics as, “Don’t use one of those little Handi-Vac things to empty an ashtray. Because the inrush of air could potentially reignite the fading embers. And, uh, a big jet flame might shoot out of the thing, surprising you and making you scream like a ten-year-old girl. And you might knock over your beer.”

Or “For that matter, be aware that bowling-alley employees may have a limited tolerance for other non-pajama-related behaviors, such as getting all loaded and pretending to be Godzilla and stomping on the windmill over there in the indoor miniature golf course.”

There is a reason it says "Adult" on the back of the book, and of course it also designates "Humor" and "Memoir" as well. Swear words, references to sex toys, Jell-o shots, use of said sex toys, more swear words, and drug use make this a book you might not want to leave around your kids or your elderly parents. But if you dare to crack its spine, Diary of Indignities will have you laughing out loud and maybe cringing a little.

'Hypocrite in a Pouffy White Dress - Tales of Growing Up Groovy and Clueless' by Susan Jane Gilman

In a book about 'growing up ambitious and engaging in some spectacularly imbecilic behavior,' Susan Jane Gilman’s Hypocrite in a Pouffy White Dress, a follow-up to Kiss My Tiara, takes you from the very start of a wacky life to adulthood. I’ve got my fingers crossed for another book because it has been a long time since I laughed so hard while reading.

As Gilman further attests in the 'Author’s Soapbox' of a preface, this collection of names-have-been-changed true stories -- 'or at least, I’ve recounted them as honestly as I can remember them' — serves more than a single purpose:

I’ve written this book, in part, because it seems that all of us could use a good laugh these days. Yet I’ve also written it because so many stories women are currently telling are all about getting a man. Or getting over a man. Or about getting laid. Or about not getting laid. Or about not getting laid and not getting a man, but deciding we’re ok with it. While a few stories do involve a boy, a bra, and a booty call, mostly their focus is elsewhere - on other passions and delusions that we all experience in one form or another.

The stories that you find within this book are everything the author promises and more. Each one is something that any girl, or guy for that matter, can relate to.

Hypocrite in a Pouffy White Dress is separated into three sections. Part One, entitled 'Grape Juice and Humiliation' contains, among others, ‘Nudie Hippie Kiddie Star’ and ‘A Girl's Guide to Bragging and Lying.' Part Two, ‘Not Just Horny, But Obnoxious, Too’ contains my favorite, ‘Mick Jagger Wants Me.’ And Part Three -- ‘Reality Says, “Hello”’ -- contains, among others, ‘I was a Professional Lesbian,’ ‘My Father the Park Ranger, My Mother the Nun’ and the title essay.

In ‘Mick Jagger Wants Me’ Gilman talks about how she fantasized as a teenager about Mick Jagger not only being her boyfriend but pulling up in front of her school in a black stretch limo. But he didn’t stop there; he would walk inside, come into her classroom and get down on one knee to tell her how much he has missed her for the last three hours that they have been apart. Of course the whole classroom would be staring opened-mouthed and some of the girls would have fainted between the desks.

I have to admit to having spent criminal amounts of time myself dreaming of my crush sweeping me out of school like in the movie Officer and a Gentleman. I also fantasized that I was taller with perfect skin and in a tight sparkly ball gown. If I’m dreaming I might as well dream big, right? Well Susan Jane Gilman thinks so and that is exactly how her life reads.

Not only will you laugh but you will cry as well. Susan Gilman takes everything that life has to offer and brings out the hilarious, sad, beautiful, and slightly odd things that all of us have experienced. Hypocrite is now one of my favorite books and whenever I have a chance this will be the book I tell my friends to read